Wednesday, August 26, 2009

I Confess...

..."That child needs a spanking; I would never let my child get away with that"......"I can not believe she is buying her child three more coats; we only have one coat each at our house".....Listen to that woman complain that she's hot, that they need to turn the air up - she should just be grateful she has air conditioning"...."No 4 year old should be telling her mother what she will and will not wear; I've never allowed that"....."American families are so wasteful"... "That's right Bro. Allan, you tell these people sitting out here in these pews exactly what they need to hear; I sure hope they are listening"....

I am sorry to say these are all thoughts (conversations in my head) that I've had this week. Wow, PRIDE, rearing it's ugly head. My judgemental attitude makes Satan happy and leaves Jesus feeling disrespected. It's so easy to get caught up in trying to do the right thing and trying to live the right way...and than flush it all down the toilet with and aggravated glance or a disagreeing sigh. I want to meet with Jesus and listen to Him. I want to live my life in the way I feel God has called me to...but if I'm trying or even succeeding...does that make me better? NO !!! I'm still not worthy...I'm still a sinner. We are all caught up in the rat race... many of us are trying our best to keep our focus on Jesus...Where I succeed...someone else is failing and vice versa...Instead of judging them, I should be reaching out to them...being Jesus to them. I certainly expect others to help me in places I struggle....It's our nature. So I'm trying to catch myself more. When I roll my eyes (even if it's just on the inside of my head..yes, I can do that) because I've been inconvenienced...or when I sigh in judgement at the way someone does or does not handle a situation. I'm only raising my own blood pressure...and no one got to see Jesus in the line, aisle or car I was in. I believe Satan loves us angry and judgemental...especially when we are coming against another Christian. God has truly convicted my heart this week...I'm receiving an attitude adjustment....Much Needed!!! And although I continue to believe we only need one coat each...it's not my job to convict...I think I'll leave that up to the Holy Spirit. God has changed my mind about so many things over the last few years. As I look back.. I know seeds were planted many times by folks just living it out in front of me....not by a pointing a finger or an uninvited lecture from an angry, rigid "Christian". I don't ever want to become that..."That" kept me from God for almost a lifetime...but that's another post:) If His joy is my strength and I am filled with His Spirit, than I should find it quite impossible to huff, puff, sigh and moan.
Note: As I read over this, I am feeling a bit ashamed of my thoughts (and there were many). It's very ugly and mean....Now I, Kelly, Praise and Exalt and Glorify the King of heaven, because everything you do is right and all your ways are just. And as I walk in pride you are able to humble me....Daniel 4:37

Thank you for your forgiveness...Thank you that your mercies are new every morning....

3 comments:

Lynda said...

So when I offer a book like CREATIVE CORRECTION to a mom whose child is less than obedient, is that being an encourager or judgmental? And yes, I have done that at least twice! One mom told me she did not need it. We wanted to tell her she did . . . . . The other accepted it gladly.
Love you girlfriend.
Keep letting the Holy Spirit convict so you can blog about it and HE can get us the second time.

Laura said...

OK, Sister...were you talking about me???? Were you??? I mean really I am 9 months pregnate and it was HOT...but i never ask for the air to be turned down:)

Really on a serious note, I love your heart and that you try to keep it real...as always you are in my prayers!!

The Stums said...

I just thought you had asthma or something. When you feel huffy, just break out an inhaler. At least it will remind you to chill. This said, I'm a world class eye roller and smirker, so I, too, am challenged by your post!