Thursday, November 12, 2009

If He Comes

I’ve been searching for my purpose…..well my human (in my own mind) purpose …..God’s purpose is played out as long as I obey him…and keep my eyes on him …..follow his commandments….I couldn’t wrap my mind around it anyway. Actually it is probably more simple… God with all that you are and love your neighbor as yourself …..this is what Jesus said you know ……simple really. I want to love the neighbor who is about 5 years old and the dirtiest child I’ve ever seen in person….living on the street ….but with a smile that made my heart happy. What did she have to smile about? Maybe seeing the white person was a good enough reason ….she ran after me….unashamedly….I hugged her and moved on. I want to go back and see her…maybe take her an apple and some water and a hug. She literally is my neighbor, living just around the corner from my gate….but she is my neighbor regardless of where she lives ….so are you. So really, it is simple. Why can’t I chase after Jesus the same way that little girl chased after me? It really is a likely parallel ….to that little girl maybe I was hope or change…someone to lift her up out of her despair…a reason to smile. That is what Jesus was to me (and still is). One day I looked up from my dirty, boring life that was leading me down the road to death….and I just happened to see this cool guy walk by. He was different from anything I’d ever seen. He noticed me….not like the others. He embraced me….he offered me something different and new and it filled my heart with hope. So much so that I couldn’t help but smile. I by no means am comparing myself to Jesus …..but I am called to be as much like him as I can be. Maybe I can be Jesus to that little girl…if not me, than who? God knit her together in her mother’s womb…he created her with a purpose…a plan for her future. God doesn’t make mistakes….she wasn’t an accident….she is not a burden. She didn’t mess up ….we did. That’s right…. “we” did….all of us. By being part of a society that allows there to be 147 million orphans (does anybody really believe God made that many extra children…whoops). The apathy is tearing me apart …mine and everyone else’s. I know it sounds so cliché, but what if Jesus did come back today. Do you think He just wouldn’t notice the 147 million? Do you think He would accept our excuses? Heck no, I think He would be mad…really mad …knocking tables over mad. Why do you have so much extra room in your house …why do you have so much extra money in your bank account? Why are MY children starving? Why are MY children dirty? Why are MY children alone? Why do you have plenty and MY children have none? Did I not tell you to care for MY sheep? Did I not tell you to do to the least of these what you would do to ME? Did I not tell you the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these? Did I not tell you whoever welcomes a little child in MY name welcomes ME? How in the world do you come up with an excuse good enough to make Jesus say, “Oh yeah, I guess you’re right, that is more important than MY children”. It breaks my heart and it hurts my soul…deep inside of me. Where I question God and man. I become still…not because I am thinking of something great or even spending time with my Lord …but because I feel empty. So helpless …I just sit and listen to a constant whisper in my ear. The lies are overwhelming but they make sense …because Satan seems to be winning this one. I absolutely refuse to give in!!!!!!! I “MUST” do something to make a difference in that little girl’s life. I have to step out of my comfort zone…take a chance ….be unashamed.


Chris said...

Kelly, Last Sunday was Orphan Sunday, and my husband preached about it, and YWAM was there sharing too. Well, he didn't get it all out, so it continues this Sunday!!
If you don't know already, we are "B" & "C"'s new family in Washington! We have a courtdate Dec. 4th! We can't wait...and we're looking forward to meeting you, hopefully sometime in Jan.

Anyway, I just read your blog to Jeff, and it hits the nail on the head!! It touched us both deeply! His message next Sunday, is focusing on "who is your neighbor" focusing on the orpahns. He wanted me ask if it's okay if he shares was great! And yes, we agree that we all need to be Jesus to these kids!

Thank you so much for all you're doing there...........we will continue to pray for you!

Chris & Jeff Butler

misslynda said...

Oh, Kelly - - - you are amazing. I love the way you talk about your spiritual walk and I love your compassionate heart. Please don't let yourself be overwhelmed and burn out with all the needs you see. I don't know how a person says "yes" to some and "no" to others but I will pray that God gives you a clear picture of those HE wants you to help. Also, I will pray that you will never lose the desire to meet needs, not be haunted by those you can't, and be ever grateful for the intervention you have given each day to forever change the lives of those in your care.

Caribbean Cindy said...

You ARE making a difference, Kelly, a BIG one!! I think you are so right about all we are going to have to answer for some day! God does want us to take care of His children. It convicts me to think of it! Thanks so much for sharing your heart with us. I agree with Lynda, you have to pick and chose how to use the resources and energy you have. God only intends for you to do Kelly's part. Unfortunately you can't make up for the lack of the whole Christian population. Love you!

Heather Thompson said...

I just wanted to tell you what an inspiration you are! Thank you for sharing your words and life. For motivating me to do more. In prayer, Heather.

Melissa Reuter said...

I love love love this!!! It was also amazing to hear the music by Gateway. Last night I was looking Joel Olsteen (do not tell Victoria but I think I have crush on him) and the Gateway choir was singing and they are WONDERFUL. Well guess what you have playing today my new favorite song. You and your honest words are a blessing.

Your favorite big sis is proud of you!!!!

Jake said...

Amazing post. Really- amazing.